Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

How is sex in college like with roommates and big campuses?

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I have complete contempt for traitorism

Do you consider yourself pretty?

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

What is your favourite colour and why?

I see through liars

I don’t cotton to rapists

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

Kuorans can you write a sad story about kpop?

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Why do I want to be caught sucking dick by my wife?

I actually pay taxes

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

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I can read

I have complete contempt for fakery

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

What can I do after 18 cops raided my home, without a warrant, seeking a person who didn't live there and wasn't there, and also went through all of my stuff? The person wasn't on the lease, and they didn't see him enter.

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

What are the pros and cons of arranged marriages?

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

Why do heterosexual men like anal sex with women? I think it's because they secretly want to have anal sex with a man? What do you think?

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I can count

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

What would happen if the Soviet Union had simply annexed Manchuria after World War 2 or kept it independent as a puppet state allied them and separate from China as China was too weak too oppose it anyway?

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I have been married for 34 years, and I found out my wife lied, and cheated a lot back before we got married. Does she not change, or is it possible she is still a cheater?

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

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I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

Why do I feel so lazy every time I get into my room?

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I understand how hurricane paths work

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t buy bullshit

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I have a reading level above third grade

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday